Do You Assume You Know Their Story?

Lonnie was a curmudgeon in a wheelchair. Some would say we were kindred spirits.

Lonnie built a successful business after being diagnosed with MS. He was a smart entrepreneur and a hard worker, and he had one personal pet peeve.

“Why do people assume, because I’m in a wheelchair, that I’m either ignorant or indigent?”

I knew Lonnie about twenty years ago. I’m telling you about his colorful alliteration because I’ve recently been subjected to the discrimination to which he objected. On this trip I’ve encountered several folks who assume I live on government disability support. It’s the first time I recall being confronted with this presumption, and it troubles me. I know there are ndis provider countries like Australia. With an NDIS scheme, the Australian government tends to extend its support to the specially-abled people in financial terms. I would too be happy and thankful to receive such financial funding to back my health expenses.

I need to be 100% crystal clear about one point: I love that our country has a safety net. I’m glad we care for those in need. There’s absolutely nothing bad or weak about accepting help when you need it.

I’m also not setting myself up to judge who does and doesn’t need help. If some folks abuse the system, that’s an ethical issue for another time.

My question is simple. Do people automatically assume I’m “needy” because I sit in a wheelchair? Have they always made this assumption? If so-why?

Honestly, this isn’t an issue I’ve thought about until complete strangers casually asked questions like how big my insurance settlement was, how much disability income I receive, and why the government doesn’t provide this or that benefit for me.

The questions surprised me, first because strangers so easily asked about personal finances and second because they were certain they knew my personal story based on some external details.

That second part matters. When we draw conclusions about an individual based on a small sample of circumstances like skin color, nationality, where they live, or whether they sit in a wheelchair-that’s the heart of discrimination. Discrimination can come up at any point, whether that be in day-to-day life or in a work setting, people can face it and feel singled out, resulting in bad mental health and potential resignation as they do not want to face that discrimination every day. Luckily there are legal support systems such as https://www.dhillonlaw.com as well as similar others, that can help make a case and bring justice to a situation, but it can still be hard for the individual to deal with in the process, so ideologies need to change.

I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

I didn’t receive a big insurance payout after my injury. I’ve never sought or accepted any disability payments. I have no idea if I’m “entitled” to them, because I never asked. In Lonnie’s words, sitting in a wheelchair doesn’t automatically make me indigent.

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I sat next to a homeless guy in church yesterday. I don’t assume he’s lazy or mentally ill or any of the other stereotypes we so easily attach to “homeless guy.” I don’t know his story.

I met some courageous women at Casa Grande’s Home of Hope last week. They’re battling addiction, but each has a story-and I don’t know it based on the fact that they came and listened to me speak for a few minutes.

Jesus met a Samaritan woman at a well. Everyone else judged her based on external circumstances. He saw the woman’s heart, spent some time with her, and changed the course of a life.

Let’s avoid assuming we know people without taking the time to know them.

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We finished up the bike ride part of this tour with a nice 42-mile ride on Saturday. We’ve got a few speaking engagements in Tucson today and tomorrow before we head home.

I posted an article about Celebrating today over at BOUNCING BACK. Please stop over and take a look.

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