Everyone has an opinion.
Dick Foth says deep conversations need to be about more than opinions. He suggests authentic interaction happens around “What do you think? What do you know? What do you feel?”
The idea, I think, is that if we’re truly willing to invest in the other person, if we’re willing to listen to what the other person thinks, knows, and feels, it’s possible for our opinions to begin discussions rather than end them.
It’s possible for our opinions to begin discussions rather than end them
“I got vision and the rest of the world’s wearing bifocals.” – Butch Cassidy (Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid)
It’s awfully tempting to be certain I’m the guy with vision. All those other folks are nearsighted, right? And then I consider that maybe–just maybe–the view from my safe, suburban, got-plenty-of-food-and-clean-water-and-a savings-account USAmerican mid-sized city may not be typical of what most folks around the world, or even in other parts of my own country, see when they roll out of bed each morning.
Fact is, perspective’s heavily impacted by our stories. Culture, race, economics–all those external factors combine to shape how we see events and issues. Combine those with the 24/7 media onslaught and it’s easy to form and be certain about those opinions. And it’s an easy next step to bludgeon folks with our opinions as though they were eternal truths. The wise people I know don’t do that.
Wise people use what they think, know, and feel as springboards to further learning.
If you wish to be known as a know-it-all, prove how smart you are. If you wish to become wise, continue to learn. Listen to what others think, know, and feel.
If you wish to reinforce your position, listen only to those voices with whom you agree. If you wish to become wise, study and understand opposing views. Seek out those whose stories are different from yours and might cause you some discomfort.
To me, this is the great divide in the world today — not between liberal and conservative, rich and poor, or between any one race or creed and all the others, [but] between people who have the courage to listen and those who are convinced that they already know it all. – Madeleine Albright, Former U.S. Secretary of State
I don’t suggest that all truth is relative–it’s not. I don’t suggest that all opinions have equal merit–they don’t. But all people have equal value as children of God.
Everyone has a story. Everyone deserves to be treated with dignity and respect. Everyone deserves to be treated as an individual rather than a label.
I don’t suggest, in any manner, that we compromise core beliefs. I do suggest that nothing about listening to and valuing another person’s story does that. Listening without judgement demonstrates commitment to my faith in Jesus.
# # #
In four weeks the FREEDOM TOUR team will gather. Seventeen individuals, seventeen stories, seventeen sets of know, think, feel..
Seventeen unique cords striking a single harmonious chord to create some art as we travel 500 miles together. Requires humility. And listening. And wisdom.
How about you? Maybe you’re not riding a bike 500 miles, but you’re likely in relationships and you probably have opinions.
Can you listen to what others “think, know, and feel”? Can you express those three things?
Can you use your opinion to BEGIN a discussion rather than to end one?