HAPPY MONDAY!
A thought-provoking quote brings us today’s word-of-the-week…
COMFORT
“Comfort isn’t a solution.”
Take a minute and think about that statement. It’s a truth that turns a lot of our instincts on their heads.
We all know not to simply put a band-aid on even a small infected wound. First you clean and perhaps apply disinfectant, even if it stings. Covering it might be more comfortable now, but you risk bigger problems later.
Comfort doesn’t solve the problem.
Confronting nearly any problem is a lot like that small wound. Confronting it almost always involves some discomfort. Ignoring, soothing, and avoiding simply prolong the issue and usually risk greater deferred pain.
This doesn’t mean we can’t show compassion. It’s possible to acknowledge and deal with pain with empathy and love. But “it’s going-to-be-okay” responses to difficult challenges don’t help anyone.
As I pondered this quote I thought about Jesus. He had the power to comfort the people He loved so deeply, but He didn’t. He asked them to confront the very difficult and painful circumstances of their lives with courage and integrity. He knew they would struggle, but He also knew where the path would lead. And He knew they wouldn’t be alone.
Slapping a band-aid on humanity’s problems wasn’t God’s plan. He sent Jesus to clean and disinfect our wounds, except He took on all the pain.
I’m learning to back away from my endless search for comfort. It’s not about seeking pain, it’s about not avoiding its lessons when it inevitably appears.
It’s Monday. How can you show compassion without using comfort to avoid the issues you’ll face?
Have a great week!
Please leave a comment here.
Show compassion to yourself when dealing with your own issues or showing compassion to someone else when dealing with their issues? Because I am at a crossroads with someone I dearly love and care about who is covered from head to toe with band aids and he isn’t healing. I’ve tried to be compassionate with him but I have gotten no where. I’ve tried to set an example by being an open book and sharing my struggles, issues and lessons learned but that is not making a difference. I’ve tried to open and honest with him about his needing to take responsibility for his wounds and heal them rather than slapping a bandaid on them and waiting for someone else to heal them but then he calls me mean. Personally, I feel that the first step to healing your wounds is to take responsibility for them. Sure, maybe someone else hurt you but you are responsible for those wounds once inflicted. You can, like you said just cover them in band aids and hopie they will heal on their own or turn to someone else and hope they can heal you or you can WORK at healing yourself.
Amy, you’re right, and it’s HARD to be in your position. He may call you all sorts of names–believe me, I’ve been the name caller. But you do him no favors by trying to solve his problems.
On the other hand, you can’t force someone else to confront their problems. Sometimes the most loving, and most difficult, thing you can do is to hang in there patiently with a person. Compassion doesn’t mean continually beating him over the head with confrontation. Can you be his friend even if he decides not to do, at least for now, what you think he should do? That’s what Jesus does…thankfully.
I can and have been his friend for years now, I even gave him many boxes of bandages but rather than thank me for them he told me they weren’t good enough. I guess mine were CVS brand and he only wants the Band Aid brand. I will always be here to help him up when he falls but now my first aide kit is empty and I have no intentions of restocking it. 🙂