Do you think you’re aware of how much you’re controlled by other people’s opinions?
If you follow along at all, you know I’m planning this epic adventure at the end of the summer. I’m excited, but there’s this one teeny tiny itsy bitsy problem.
Actually, it’s not a small problem at all. One part of Rich’s Ride just isn’t working out.
Honestly, it hasn’t been working out for quite a while. While everything else seems to be falling into place, every time I tackle this particular issue it feels like I’m pounding a square peg into a round hole with a screwdriver.
Today one of my really wise friends asked me about it. I listed about a hundred excuses for why it couldn’t change; he looked perplexed and dropped the question.
After he left I got past the excuses and realized that I’ve been clinging to a bad situation out of fear. Nothing all that surprising there, until I asked myself what I’m afraid of.
I’m afraid of you…
…or, more precisely, I’m afraid of what you’ll think about me if I change my mind after all this time and planning.
It’s not just you. I’m afraid of my church family, my small group, my Facebook friends, the audiences I’ve talked to—heck, I’m afraid of people who don’t even know about this crazy project yet. My fear of their opinions, what they’ll think of me, has literally immobilized me on this issue.
Have I prayed about it? Yes, and I think I’ve been feeling a pretty strong sense that I needed to move in a different direction. But that doesn’t help much when I value the Spirit’s guidance less than popular opinion.
Dog treats
Folks like to complement Monte for his obedient nature. “He’ll do anything to please you.”
Nice sentiment, but the fact is he’s really well trained. It’s fun to believe he wants to please me, but really he’ll do anything for a dog biscuit.
I’m not much different; I’ll do anything to get others to think highly of me. And as long as that’s the case, neither Monte nor I have much freedom.
I don’t know many authentically free people who really aren’t swayed by what others think. I know a few who go to great lengths to look as if they don’t care, but I think they actually might care more than most.
Somewhere there’s a line between caring about people and caring so much about their opinion of me that I become like a dog chasing treats.
I haven’t found that line … yet.
What’s one area where you allow others’ opinions to control you?
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