A community is a group of people united through a common struggle with the same stories.
This definition comes from an insightful article by Chris Guillebeau called What Makes A Community?
I highly recommend Chris’ site, The Art of Nonconformity. Chris’ writing makes me think and inspires me to extend my own ideas. I took a long bike ride yesterday and considered one of his claims about community.
Chris asserts that “…a community needs friends AND enemies …You need a villain, a bad guy. The bad guy can be a person, group, idea, or belief … having a defined enemy increases the strength of the community.”
I think he’s probably correct, but “enemy” is a dangerous term that can generate significant misunderstanding and unnecessary conflict. We must define such a concept clearly and deploy it carefully.
Every community has insiders and outsiders. If we’ve decided to join a particular community, we naturally agree and identify with its members. The insiders are “us” and the outsiders are “them.” Unfortunately, we tend to create excessive and pointless quarrels by incorrectly casting all of “them” as the enemy.
My friend Eric characterizes a community as a circle. Eric says that you need to be clear about what it means to be inside the circle, the shared vision that defines the community. If you don’t choose to enter, that’s fine. We still respect and value you; you’re just not in this particular circle right now.
Choosing to remain outside a community doesn’t make you evil. “They” aren’t automatic enemies.
In fact, if you wish to expand the circle and grow the community, the new members must come from “them.” You’re not going to attract folks to your circle by calling them names and portraying them as evil.
Sadly, insecure members of a community often feel threatened by those who choose not to enter their circle. It’s somehow okay if we decide to exclude you, because then we’re in control. But there’s a sense of rejection when you determine that my circle’s not for you. We need to be secure enough to avoid labeling those who choose differently as the evil enemy.
A true enemy poses an actual threat to the community or its members. Simply choosing not to enter the circle shouldn’t be interpreted as threatening.
I’m not certain whether a community “needs” enemies. My idealistic side wants to believe they don’t, but in the real world it probably doesn’t matter. Most communities have natural enemies, so we just need to be clear about the bad guy’s true identity. He’s already there; we don’t need to invent him.
If the community values itself and its members, it’s important to identify, define, and confront actual threats. Real threats shouldn’t be ignored, but we don’t need to waste time and energy on imagined dangers.
Ideally, we establish a community to accomplish something apart from simply perpetuating itself. The real potency of the circle isn’t enhanced much by repelling invaders, because this sort of oppositional mentality gives “them control. “Their” tactics, agendas, and priorities dictate the actions of the community.
Real strength develops when a community unites behind a common purpose. Ironically, that sort of shared vision tends to attract “them” and make them want to join “us.”
The best way to destroy an enemy is to make him a friend. ~ Abraham Lincoln
Who are your real enemies? How can you make your community such an attractive place that he wants to join you?
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